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happy birthday, juliette!!!!!!!

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bad kid
Georgina Sparks + assorted canon relationships.
1364 words. R.
W: prostitution, drug use, the usual suspects.

Summary: It's not a bad thing to want to feel whole.


Note: Ahh I am so sorry this is late!!!! I am just so braindead about writing lately. I hope you like it, bb!!!






bad girl


Georgina doesn't know how to be anything but rotten.

She's been a terror since her conception. She made her mother sick, made her bedridden, put her through a labor that lasted almost two days. She was the kind of baby who screamed all night. She bit other kids on the playground and chased away all her nannies. She saw more time-outs than any of the other kids combined. No one knew what to do with Georgina.

Eventually her parents chose to ignore her. It was really the best course of action. She preferred fending for herself, anyway.

Neglected brats have a way of sniffing each other out; as soon as Georgina saw Serena across a classroom, it was love. They were eleven. Georgina had already lost her virginity to Isabel Coates' older brother; Blair Waldorf had already claimed Serena for life. Serena had a bad habit of flirting with high school boys and was on the precipice of a lot of other bad habits that Georgina was only too happy to help her discover.

Happy is something she only ever was with Serena. It was a kind of glossy manufactured happy — pill happy, drug happy — but it was still the closest Georgina ever got to it.





bible thumper


Months after she is expelled from the pure and guileless embrace of OMJC, Georgina still can't decide if she was bullshitting everyone or not.

They all thought sending her away would be some fantastic punishment, but Jesus camp felt like a pet project to her. She couldn't wait to cause a stir – distribute illegal substances, fuck girls and boys off of their moral high ground. She wanted to leave a swath of wide-eyed broken-hearted confusion in her wake, wanted to take from them innocence she never had. Except —

It's not a bad thing to want to feel whole. There are girls at the camp who look up at Jesus prostrated and cross themselves. A slow peaceful look settles in their eyes like they just did a bump and they release their sins in a wistful sigh.

It's not a bad thing to want to be like that.





co-ed


At first it's all about screwing over Blair Waldorf, a simple goal with a simple end. Instead it quickly becomes about screwing Dan Humphrey and, well, that's not so simple.

It should be, though. That's what keeps tripping her up. It should be simple and easy and amusing. It certainly was the first time. The first time she'd known without having to ask that he'd never been with anyone besides Serena. He'd shivered when she touched him, gone pink in the face like a blushing virgin. She'd only gone down on him; Dan had clutched his rocket ship flannel bedsheets in both hands, bit his lip, shut his eyes too tightly, forgot to breathe. They were only sixteen and it was so easy to make him fall apart.

Of course, she'd been a different person then, quite literally.

Dan's a different person now too, confident and sexy and take-charge. He takes direction beautifully. He doesn't hesitate to use his teeth or pull her hair or go harder when she says so. He grabs her ass when they make out, even in public. There's no tremor when he touches her now – and wouldn't you know, Georgina kind of misses it.





call girl


Here's the one secret Georgina will always keep: she never fucked a Russian on the plane.

She fucks quite a lot of them off the plane, however. As soon as she realizes she's on her own and her parents have frozen her accounts, she gets right down to the only kind of work she'd ever bother with. She accrues clients quickly, rents a gorgeous flat, and settles in to live out the spring as a Russian prostitute. She likes it. It's honest work and she doesn't have to do that much of it, considering she caters mostly to rich women's bored husbands.

She realizes she's missed her period a month or two after she actually misses it. Her period was always sporadic but she's not stupid so she gets her ass to a doctor only to find out she's eight weeks pregnant. It's not difficult to figure out the where and when of conception — she can narrow it down to any number of sunny afternoons in an NYU dorm, any number of times she told Dan not to bother because she was on the pill anyway.

It's funny. It was probably the one time in her life she was legitimately monogamous and look where it got her.

Again, Georgina isn't stupid. She's certainly not going to keep the thing. She'll get it taken care of at her earliest convenience, whenever that turns out to be. It won't be the first time she's had to do so, anyway. It's old hat by now.

Today, she tells herself, it happens today, she goes today. But instead she realizes she has to do her nails and she's got a hair appointment and a client at six. She couldn't possibly go today, no, today is booked solid, it'll just have to wait. She has a whole more month of being able to wait (legally) and a whole lot more after that if she goes another route.

Once her stomach starts to curve and her back starts to ache and her tits swell up, she reluctantly admits that she's probably not getting the abortion. There are a certain sect of guys that like the whole pregnant thing anyway, she might as well milk it for as long as she can.

Georgina spends seven months of her pregnancy fucking men for money and never gives it a second thought.





mother


Georgina had never held a baby before they put Milo in her arms. She didn't even want him then; she handed him right off to Dan and asked how soon it would be before she could go to the spa because, frankly, giving birth was the most disgusting thing she'd ever gone through. The nurses laughed like she was kidding and smiled at Dan, who was doing everything right, looking endearingly terrified and awed. He was always so good at that, the human emotion thing, and Georgina had never really been able to manage it.

Dan names the baby. Dan takes care of the baby. Dan gets excited when the baby smiles and when the baby lifts his head and when the baby rolls over. Dan has a playlist on his iPod labeled 'for the baby.' But despite all that, despite his taking to this child like she never will, he defers every time she brings up the birth certificate.

He's already yours, she wants to say. Just sign it so I can leave.

Dan does, of course, eventually. He's too good to help himself, and maybe he felt that genetic attachment thing she never did. Or didn't think she did, anyway; it wasn't until biology made her hormones crazy that Georgina ever felt things like real guilt, or even empathy. She feels bad about saddling Dan with a kid for some reason, so she takes the kid away to pass off to someone else. Maybe her parents will want it.

The funny thing was, the only thing she lied about was lying in the first place.





wife


Philip is presented to her by her parents and he looks decent enough on paper. He's solid and boring and went to all the right schools, has the right job, likes kids. She figures she's probably going to have a lot of husbands, so she ought to start somewhere. She'll get a decent settlement out of the eventual divorce.

He's amusing enough, she supposes.





miscellaneous


Georgina has always been too happy to drop her current life for the next great adventure, careless of who she leaves behind. Philip will take care of Milo; or whatever, someone will. He can't have really expected her to stay because Georgina never stays, she has no interest in it. Serena liked to play at abandonment but she loved people too much to really commit and Georgina never had that problem. Georgina's never loved anyone, not even herself.

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